Tuesday, June 2
5 Ways To Avoid The Social Media Comparison Trap
I’ve never been one of the cool kids. And this fact, to this day, is why I have a lot of the silly neurosis that I have (IS EVERYONE HANGING OUT WITHOUT ME?!). I’m pretty easy to get along with, so I’ve always been a friend of some cool kids, but never really one of them. I’m forever just outside, not really invited to the party but sometimes I get to go by proxy. Do you know the feeling?
For the last year I’ve been intentional about trying to distance myself from that feeling. It’s hard, I’ll be honest, because the internet makes comparisons so stinkin’ easy. And you can feel like everyone is best friends with everyone else... except you. Just a click here, a URL there and boom! I can easily find 10 social media accounts that make me feel like I suck at whatever it is I'm trying to accomplish that day.
I thought that maybe I’m not the only one dealing with this, so I figured I’d share some tips that I’ve used over the last year to help remove myself from the comparison trap and set myself up for success. Because let’s be honest: If I have no idea what the cool kids are doing, I won’t feel left out.
Step 1. Clean out your follow lists and pare it down to the best of the best. There’s no need for me to see what every single one of my peers did this week because, inevitably, I will compare it to what I did, what I accomplished, the ideas I came up with, how much better their idea was, etc. STOP IT!!!! What everyone else is doing is no longer your concern. In fact, the less you pay attention to what everyone else is doing, the more brain space you open up to focus on what you're good at, to find your own unique voice and perspective, and to come up with your own righteous ideas to change the world.
Step 2. Hide the people from your newsfeed that are not adding value to your life. Or who make you feel bad about yourself and your choices and your life in general. Or who's updates make you feel all rage-y inside because your personal beliefs are so different. Why put yourself though that? You don't need to unfriend them, because, let's not burn bridges here. But just unsubscribe from their updates so you aren't getting brought down because of what they put out there. Keep what inspires you in front of your eyes and lock down the rest.
Step 3. Find whatever inspires you and start spending more of your time there. Hate taking photos? Then stop trying to force yourself to grow an Instagram following. Writing make you feel like ripping your eyeballs out? Why are building a blog then? What fills you with joy? What do you want to do with you time? What do you do really well? What do you think is total rubbish? Doing more of the first three and cut out that last one. We are never going to truly leave an impact on this world if we are watering down our talents by forcing ourselves to take on stuff that doesn't make us come alive just because other people are doing it. We've got to discover our own wow factor.
Step 4. Stop trying to be your idols. Do what you love whether it’s the current rockstar style or not, and do a kick-ass job of it. Be inspired by them but use that to uncover your own unique voice. You'll never be as effective at being someone else than they will. No use wasting your time trying to be the sequel. It's time to write your own story. Be the one other people try to copy!
Step 5. Lastly, and probably most importantly... Take social media with a grain of salt. Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest, Blogs... they are the highlight reel. You can't compare your daily ins and outs to other people's highlight. It's just not fair or realistic. Remind yourself that they have bad days/months/seasons, too. I’ll be honest, some days social media feels like one big brag fest and everyone’s positivity when I’m having a bad day can be maddening. (Just let me mope, Universe!) But social media is a necessary and wonderfully powerful blessing in my life, and I love that I can communicate with so many people in such an easy way! So I work social media to my advantage and filter what I read through the knowledge that everyone is trying to promote themselves in a positive way, just like I am. (Except I do show you photos of my messy house and bloated belly from time to time. YOU'RE WELCOME INTERNET! #keepingitreal)
Now to anyone who might be reading this or has stumbled upon this while looking into Beachbody Coaching. Here's my message especially for you... I want you just as you are. I want to spend my days mentoring people who are who they are. Come meet me right here, just as you are in this moment. Let's talk about your hopes and dreams, your talents and your struggles. Let's talk about what makes you come alive and help you figure out how to be a success at that!
Just like the famous quote by Howard Thurman says, "Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive."
The world doesn't need more people going through the motions. The world doesn't need copies. The world doesn't need someone else out there living averagely. The world needs YOU. And it needs you ALIVE and BLAZING with passion. The world needs YOU. Apply to join my mentorship program here. We'll work together to help you utilize your strengths to create a life of passion and purpose as a coach!
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