Sunday, July 24
PERSONAL // A Letter To 2013 Self...
Dear 2013 Becka,
I see you. I do. I know you think that no one does. I see your hurt and your constant struggle to re-gain some sort of recognizable parts of yourself. To grab onto some bit of confidence. I see you grasp at anything hoping this will help you out of your hole and I watch the ropes snap off in your hands leaving you without hope for any escape. I know how frustrated you are. I know how you feel like you're just treading water all day every day. I see the way you carry on. I see your exhaustion battling a disease you barely understand causing damage you don't realize you are causing. I see your struggle.
I know you are doubtful. I know you think that your future is set. I know you poured your blood, sweat, and tears into photography and you wonder how long you can keep up the pace. I know you secretly long to have weekends to spend with family and friends as your son gets bigger. I know you hate living booking to booking, wondering if you'll have enough money for the holidays. Having to miss out on birthdays and farewell parties to take extra bookings to pay the bills. But I'm here to tell you that INCREDIBLE things are on your horizon. Hold on just 1 more month! Because next month you are going to be presented with something that will change the trajectory of your future. And be brave Becka, because you're going to have to scrounge up all those last embers of faith you might have to decide to give this new lifestyle and opportunity your all in the midst of lots of naysayers.
When it comes, you are going to have to make a decision. A decision to try ONE LAST TIME or to let it pass you by. Decide to try! Find a way to make it work. Don't hide from the work. And show up every day with the best effort you can. Don't worry about those squat jumps, you'll get better. And stronger. And don't rush it. You'll slip up here and there but you're going to build an incredible community that will hold you up when you start to fall. You might not believe this but you're going to have an entire squad by your side and working alongside you! It's going to change you in all the best ways! Get ready old friend, your world is about to completely transform! Hold onto hope. I'll see you on the other side!
PS. Don't ever do bangs again, k? ;)
Love, 2016 Becka
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